Illusions" By: Aayah Hassanein"

 

 

 

      Chapter 4

 

 

 

 

It was a bright warm morning. The birds were happy that they flew through the clear blue sky. The calm, peace silence, that I was enjoying, came to end as I heard a knock at the door. Who could come so early in the morning? But then I remembered that Autumn had told me that she’ll be arriving today to show me her suggested friend.

Opening the door, I found Autumn with her long blonde hair tied into a bun which really caught my attention. She didn’t look at all like yesterday with a colourful spring dress that looked perfect on her. In her company was a midge lady with brown short hair. Just as I saw her I remembered my dear mother. It was as if my mom came back to life. I stayed for several moments staring at the two gorgeous figures that stod by my door, that I forgot to welcome them in. “Good morning, Autumn. Come in.”

They both entered behind me into the living room. It felt a little obvious that I was seated before they were. I tried to understand the lady’s looks. But she never made an eye contact with me. Somehow I felt embarrassed so I wanted to oil the wheels. “Would you like a cup of coffee?” They were both silent for moments, but then I saw Autumn stand up and say, “I’ll do them, just stay John.”

I was confused, why she did this. Did she really want me to sit all alone with this lady who didn’t even utter a word since her arrival. From between my thoughts I heard a soft voice say, “I’ll come with you Autumn.” It was her, finally she did talk. Her voice is so sweet, so why was she too shy to talk in front of me?

“No, Helen you stay here and start your conversation with John, Tom’s father.” I really wanted to thank Autumn as she was my saving grace. I would have felt so embarrassed if they both went to prepare a cup of coffee and I stay seated over here.

“So…Hi…How are you?” Her voice was so hesitant it reminded me of my mother, that day when she was extremely ill and she asked to trust our father when she is gone. As I sank deeply in my thoughts, I heard some word from what she was saying that grabbed my attention, “ …I’ll need to know more about your wife and kids as I’ll be staying here for a long time.”

“Sure, by time everything will be known to you Helen, don’t rush through the detail” Autumn’s voice was heard as she came from the kitchen with the coffee. “You are going to like it here. Believe me!”

I was amazed, why was she talking with great confidence. She neither knew me nor my children. It felt strange. What was stranger, was that I accepted this strange lady named Helen to enter my house and break through our private life without even informing Bella. But how would I inform her…when she arrives back.  

Now that Autumn had left, I had to face Helen on my own. “I’m sure you’ll enjoy it with Ellie, Tom and I, just as Autumn said.” I was trying to make her talk, but I failed as she didn’t even try to respond neither by an answer nor a smile.

“Good afternoon, daddy” I heard Ellie’s voice as she entered the house, “How are…” she was surprised to see Helen. When I tried to explain, Ellie interrupted me, “Daddy, I saw Aunt Autumn outside. Why was she here?”

“She was here because…How did you know she was your aunt when I’ve never told you about her and you have never seen her?”

“I met her outside the house and she told me everything. She even told me about Helen, but why would we need a…” she took a direct to Helen before saying her profession, this made Helen realize that she is the odd one out in this conversation. She took permission to leave the room which made the atmosphere more relaxed for Ellie and I talk about the topic.

“My dear, you might think we don’t need her, but in the truth, she is really important for us nowadays. Can’t you notice that your brother is going to kill himself with all the drugs he takes?” I became so furious about Ellie refusing Helen to be in the home when she never knew that her brother was this way.

“Your brother is expelled from school. What else could we do when your mother isn’t here to help?” I saw her tears clouded with tears.

“Dad, I’m sorry, but why is mom sad from us? Why isn’t she with us right now? She could have helped in this situation.” I recognized every single word before I thought of an answer. “She was never sad from us sweetheart. She has always been our support whenever we wanted her.”

“So where is she? Why are you trying to remove her from our lives?” I couldn’t believe that my young has this outlook about me attitude with Bella. I couldn’t bear hearing anymore of this, so I furiously left the house slamming the wooden door behind me.

Where will I go…??

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ilusions" By: Aayah Hassanein "

 

 

 

      Chapter 2

 

 

 

 

 

I woke up the next morning feeling the warmth of my house. I’ve never felt like this before. Something increased my pleasure and gave me the enthusiasm to start a happy day. As me out of my bed, I heard the chirping of the birds. It was welcoming.

I had my daily routine completed and was ready to go to work. But wait… today is Saturday. Not really sure of that idea so I looked back into the calendar. I blankly stared on it until I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was Raven. “Why are you back, Raven?” I said towards the confident eyes that looked down on me.

I heard no reply and suddenly saw her fade away like steam. Confused, I fixed my gaze on the position she was in. She isn’t there, I must have been imagining. Awakening from my thoughts, I glanced through my watch to find out it was time for Ellie and Tom to wake up.

As I moved up the stairs and walked through the dimly lit hallway that was well-known to me, the voice of my dear mother, “My dear John, take care of yourself and …..” The sound slowly faded until nothing was heard. Mother! I called out, but I shut myself up after I’ve noticed that I was alone. What is wrong with me today, it looks as if I am turning crazy!!

It didn’t take me too long to reach Ellie’s room. She was my twelve-years-old beloved little child of my life. Staring through her blonde hair and blue eyes that decorated her pale face, I remembered my blessed wife, Bella. I entered the room to fill my nostrils with one of my favourite fragrances. Although its high concentration felt suffocating, I resisted on enjoying the pleasure it gave me.

I placed the tips of my finger on her back. It was warm. Just as I glared through the beauty that fascinated me, a voice called from far away saying that one day I’ll be standing in this position all by myself. The feeling of solitary struck me for a second, but then I reached out for a warm smile as I saw my child open her eyes.

A few seconds of silent looks, mutual looks were there. It was so obvious to wake her up so early, so I wasn’t able to say a thing. From her face I remembered my old childhood days when I used to tell my mother to give me more time to sleep. The sun wasn’t awake yet and she would allow me to doze off for a while. This never happened with Hailey, the wicked woman, the woman who made me suffer the rest of my life.

My thoughts were broken by the soft sound Ellie produced; it completely presented her fragility and soft-edged personality.

I greeted her and left to look for Tom who was awake all night. As usual in his generation, those teenagers in their eighteens would wish to visit night clubs, but to Tom it wasn’t just a visit it was a lifetime. This boy always drives me crazy as he is never ashamed of his mistake. This makes me wonder the reason behind Bella pampering him when he has to be a strong tough man with full intention to be better and lead a good life.

I’ve never put in mind to change him anyway because the chance of saving him is gone. He is LOST!! My only and elder boy is totally lost with a group of reckless teenagers that we can’t pick him from between them.

I opened the door to take a look and left immediately to grab a bite as hunger was killing me!

We were seated on the breakfast table my dear Ellie and I. We chucked in food without even uttering one single word. Out of the blue, Ellie looked around and said anxiously, “Daddy, where is mother?!”

“She travelled and would be here soon.” I gave a quick reply without even thinking of it. This made me feel as if I already knew that she would ask me this question. Ellie gave me a look of dissatisfactory. She thought I was just a fool, because Bella was just here yesterday plus it wasn’t common for her to travel without her bag and clothes even if it was an emergency flight. Ellie nodded and agreed about everything.

After breakfast, I locate myself in one of the longest streets of Edinburgh and started a pleasurable walk. I had this strong passion to connect with nature. This made me feel as if I’ve been away from a really long time. As I sat down between the colourful blossoms, I wished that Bella was here with me. It is one of the best moments I would ever spend in my life.

“Don’t think this would last for too long!!” a deep voice completely taunted my mind. It was a familiar voice that I wished not to hear again. It was her, my wicked step mother. Her words echoed over and over again in my mind as I tried to forget about it. She is dead. From 20 years, it is too long for me to remember her, but unfortunately she awakened my dark past which could never be forgotten.

I still remember every single day when we used to live in our farmhouse back in Cambridge. We use to live a happy, enjoyable life   when a strong pneumonia made my mother bedridden for months, before she died. In that period of time my father completely ignored her illness and started a new life. He was sure she’ll die so he looked forward to his own future rather than wasting time with an old ill lady and her two lonely kids. James, my elder brother, and I were down in the dumps for several weeks, our family broke apart. At that time, I hardly turned fourteen, which made me suffer what my dad would have never experienced in his forty years life time.

The truth and grief that followed was completely traumatic for my father. He wasn’t following up with my mother’s health conditions, but when she died he plunged into great despair. This was of a great shock to us. Eventually, Kames and I were forced to live in a strange, suffocating house where it wasn’t bearable to live in. James tried to comfort me, “We will adjust.”, but the strong feelings that were between mother and I strongly persuaded me that it would be hard for me to continue life here.

It looked like it never really mattered to him leaving our dear old house where all our memories are. I never got along with Hailey or her living style which was an increase in the repulsive dislike towards her.

“Don’t try to remember anything more,” the voice commanded, “You would end up in total grief!!” I was completely astonished. I fled back home, tucked myself in bed and forced myself to sleep. But my busy mind didn’t stop the thoughts that continuously flew into my grey cells.

Was this true or is it just a DREAM…?! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Illusions " By: Aayah Hassanein "

 

      Chapter 1

 

 

 

It was a cold summer night where the moon faded behind the dark clouds. The sky was filled with stars that glowed down on my silver car, as I stopped in front of my house. I was extremely exhausted after a long working day. As I stretched my shivering hand to reach the door, I was able to recognize the night’s music, starting from the eerie silence to the continuously chirping grasshoppers. Stepping out of my car, I placed my hands on the fence outlaying the garden, trying to hold my body straight without tripping. I froze. Something was moving from behind me. I shivered as I felt it keep its gaze directed to me. Feeling watched, I ignored everything and continued through our colourful garden which by night blended its colours with the pitch blackness of the sky.

Continuing my way, I felt a tap on my shoulder, but I turned to find out that I was completely alone. Not even a single soul on the street. This wasn’t everything. I was completely taunted by Raven’s voice. I thrust my arms forward to reach the door knob; I thought that home would be the only place for me to rest from all my fears. The door slowly opened giving off its usual creak which even added to my fear. A beam of light rushed through the door trying to overshadow me. Unconscious of what was happening; I bolted through the door and screamed, “BELLA!!”

Looking around the house in search of my dear wife, I realized that something was wrong. Trying to analyze, I noticed a note lay on the shelf accompanied by my forgotten cell phone. Different thoughts popped to my mind as I remembered today’s morning fight with Bella. Could she leave the house? That’s impossible.

I took several fast steps forward tell I reached the edge of the letter. Scanning the letter into my mind, I recognized Bella’s handwriting imprinted into the paper. The words talked with happiness and love. I felt it deeply as I read:

Dear John,

     My love, I’ve left today with my friends. I really apologize as I was unable to call. I ‘m coming back home at 9:3o pm, but I just wrote this note in case you came earlier than your usual timing. Really love you darling !!

Your great beloved.

Bella

 

I fluttered with happiness that I didn’t realize that it was already 11o’clock. After a few seconds, I glanced through my watch, it was too late…Bella should be... where is she??

It wasn’t too long until I heard a slight sound which broke through the silence and caught my attention. I raced down the stairs trying to follow the sound. As I walked through the hallways, I saw our old oak tree darker than the sky. They forcefully hammered on the shutters of the window. Asking to enter. I shivered as I felt the drops of sweat roll down my forehead. Although I really knew my house, I couldn’t recognize where I was. It felt like a new place I’ve never entered.

Trying to calm down and break through my fears, I ran through the hallway, but felt it again. The tap. Not daring to look back, I closed my eyes and reassured myself that there was nothing. Unaware of where I was going, I found myself in front of the big door of our basement. Being courage, I pushed the closed door open terrifying me with its long creak. I felt the house was haunted. Nothing was alright.

I forced myself inside the dimly lit room. My eyes came to a halt when I saw it… it looked so bright and white in the dark room. For one moment, I looked closer to see black threads swimming in impure red spots. There was a weird feeling that attracted me towards it. I had no idea why?! But I knew this face really well, it wasn’t strange to me. With every closer step, my heart pounded faster and faster… I finally realized it was Bella in her whit evening dress. Caught my attention. The spot of blood staining her face, it took me a second to realize it was her usual bright red lipstick. I couldn’t move a muscle, but the only thing I did is that I gave a long, lasting scream that wasn’t heard.

Gasping her soulless body, I laid her down between my arms and centered my gaze allowing myself the chance to imprint the last glance of my love before she is gone forever. As I held tight to her, I felt my heart beat like the alarms of the clock. My grief was increased by the echoing sound of my tears pitter-patter on a broken piece of glass lying just beside her arms. Tension engulfed me as I felt the moon light pass through the basement window and reach to suffocate me.

My grief led me to a shock; it was a really traumatic situation. Trying to wake her up, I remembered her voice ring in my ears, “John…my dear…take care of yourself…” the sound faded slowly till nothing was heard.

I came back to my senses to find myself lying underneath a dead body in a dark room which lay underground. I laughed hardly with all my efforts, because the fact of being in such a situation plunged me in great despair. What shall I DO…?!